One of four cards being offered for the printed Valentine's greetings to support Cardinal Glennon Children's Hospital.

The day of chocolates, flowers, and dinners with far too many expectations (and far too many prix fixe menus) is upon us-Valentine’s Day! It’s time to uncover shoe boxes for decorating, and it’s time for candid expressions of how your child feels about their classmates as they address each little card.

But before you head to the drugstore to buy stacks of die-cut cards decked with cartoon characters perhaps the folks at Cardinal Glennon Children’s Foundation can tempt you with greetings from St. Louis’s favorite furry friend-Rally Squirrel.

Rally has single-handedly turned the local tide towards he and his garden-digging brethren by doing what squirrels do best-being somewhere he really shouldn’t have been. He won the city’s heart, and this Valentine’s Day the foundation is partnering with Rally to help you win your beloved’s heart or help your child send greetings that give back via personalized Valentine’s greetings and squirrel emblazoned cards.

For just a $10 donation you can purchase a personalized video or a package of 20 printed Valentines cards featuring Rally Squirrel, with the video deliverable to as many people as you want and additional quantities of cards available for purchase. The donations from the “Cards for Kids” program benefit the Dorothy and Larry Dallas Heart Foundation and support efforts to build a playground at the hospital.

Rally Squirrel Valentines can be purchased at Glennon.org or by phone at 314.577.5605 or 800.269.0552. Video greetings will be delivered February 10 at 9am, and printed cards will arrive in the mail before February 10.

This fun video has a look at what they have in store for your Valentine this year…

Image credit: Mad Tomato

Making delicious food is a passion for Mad Tomato’s Executive Chef and owner, Vito Racanelli. When he talks about his dishes there is no mistaking that what you order at his restaurant was created with a Nonna’s care and discerning hands. And now that Racanelli has left his partnership at Onesto’s Pizza and Trattorria, an announcement that the chef made public on January 30, he has the time to focus all of his passion and excitement on the menu and new programs that were recently launched at Mad Tomato.

Community involvement is a common theme you’ll see with many restaurants like Mad Tomato who prescribe to the farm to table movement-and Mad Tomato is poised to take that idea one step further. Starting in February the restaurant is stepping up efforts to serve local charities (pun’s are awesome). During 2012 Mad Tomato is making a drive to raise $10,000 to benefit local charities, and as an extension of this effort they will be hosting special public dining events each month, during which 20% of the day’s dining bills will be donated to local charity partners and will be stepping up their private dining communal table efforts. The first public event is set for February 8 and benefits Caring for Kids, and with another public dining event set for March 29 to benefit Circus Flora.

There are some pretty exciting changes coming to the menu as well…every six weeks. Since breaking with Onesto, Racanelli has more time to dedicate to developing the culinary goals of Mad Tomato, and he explained that since he is actively involved with the kitchen and menu he knows that cooking the same thing for six weeks gets pretty boring-for everyone from cooks to diners. Their new menus will be printed every six weeks and will include a calendar for all upcoming charitable events.

And the restaurant’s dedication to locally sourced, simple ingredients and responsible environmental practices will continue to grow right along with all of the changes. In fact Racanelli said he is hoping to one day be able to make all of the charcuterie for the restaurant if the space were to open up.

Of the charitable efforts Racanelli stated, “Mad Tomato is dedicated to giving back to the community. I have always wanted to do something like this, something that directly helps those in need. I feel a responsibility to share my good fortune of doing what I love to support local non-profit organizations.”

Image credit: SimpleStories.typepad.com

It’s a new year and you’ve survived the 3,700 holiday events of the last few months with the pictures to prove it. So what do you do with all of those photos? Some of you will save them to the computer and that’s the last anyone will see of them. A few of you might share a few choice photos on Facebook or even create a photo book online.

If you’re like me, you’ll print them out and go elbow deep in acid-free paper, brads, and buttons to create a scrapbook. It’s an opportunity for me to share and tell the story behind photos of my friends and family, and a way to let my creative juices flow.

Most of the time I scrapbook along with my friends (it’s called a crop) so it’s also a chance for me to catch up with friends and see what kind of mini works of art they’re creating (Case in point: my friend Blupixy) .

Although I’ve been scrapbooking for close to 15 years – and have the piles of supplies in my basement to prove it – I’m always on the look out for faster and easier ways to capture those photos and memories. Scrapbooking takes time and we all know there is never enough time!

One of the best products I’ve seen for quick and easy scrapbooking is the Simple Stories line from Memory Works. If you’ve never scrapbooked before, or are a little overwhelmed when you see the rows and rows of products at the store, this is a great place to start! (For those of you who are already avid scrappers, these books are a great way to quickly capture that 200th trip to the zoo or park. ) Start with a binder (~$20-40) and photo sleeves (~$5-6 for 10) from We R Memory Keepers, and one of the many themed kits from Simple Stories (I recommend Life Documented or Year.o.graphy to start – ~$21) and you’re ready to go.  It’s literally as simple as cutting out the elements from the kit (they’re squares and rectangles) and sliding them and your pictures into the photo sleeves. Seriously. That’s it! You could have an entire scrapbook ready to share with your friends and family in no time at all.

You can add more elements by using the included stickers to title or embellish your page. Or you can fill in the included journaling cards and detail the photos’ events for future generations. If you’re feeling especially adventurous, some of the kits include undivided 12×12 (or 8.5 x11) page sleeves for you to create a full scrapbook page. You can be as fancy or as simple as you want or can be in the time you have.

Don’t let those photos collect cyberdust in the back of your hard drive this year. Quickly and easily create something you can be proud to show your friends and family this year and for years to come.

Image credit: www.glastonburyus.org

While watching one of the hundreds of fast-food commercials on TV, it dawned on me that the most colorful element of most of these foods seems to be the box!

Honestly, the combination of tan chicken fingers, pale brown burgers, beige French fries and white potatoes is about as dull and unappealing as the carbohydrate/preservative coma that eating these foods puts you in!

For me, eating is not only about taste and smell, but sight as well. A more colorful plate is more appetizing, and as studies show, significantly more nutritious!! And the best foods to get your “colors’ from naturally are fruits and vegetables.

The pigments responsible for plant color belong to a class of chemicals known as antioxidants, and plants make antioxidants to protect themselves from the sun’s ultraviolet light. (Ultraviolet light causes free radicals to form within plant cells which can begin to destroy parts of the plant). Antioxidants stop free radicals in their tracks, shielding cells from harm. And typically, an intensely colored plant has more of these protective chemicals than a paler one does.

According to ADA spokesperson Karen Ansel, “Adding a splash of colorful seasonal foods to your plate makes for more than just a festive meal. A rainbow of foods creates a palette of nutrients.”

Here’s how to decode what colorful produce means:

Green produce gives you all-day energy and may help promote healthy vision and reduce cancer risks. Fruits like avocado, apples, grapes, honeydew, kiwi and lime. And vegetables like artichoke, asparagus, broccoli, green beans, green peppers, and leafy greens such as spinach are great choices.

Orange and deep yellow fruits, such as apricot, cantaloupe, grapefruit, mango, papaya, peach, and pineapple. And vegetables like carrots, yellow pepper, yellow corn, and sweet potatoes, can detoxify your body and help generate power. They contain nutrients that promote healthy vision and immunity, and reduce the risk of some cancers.

Purple and blue options, including blackberries, blueberries, plums, and raisins, along with eggplant, purple cabbage, and purple-fleshed potatoes, can improve your circulation and may have antioxidant and anti-aging benefits while helping with memory, urinary tract health, and reduced cancer risks.

Red produce, like cherries, cranberries, pomegranate, red or pink grape fruit, red grapes, watermelon, beets, red onions, red peppers, red potatoes, rhubarb, and tomatoes are a great source of protein and can help vision and immunity – and may reduce cancer risks and maintain a healthy heart.

Even black foods, because of their intense “color”, have nutritional benefits. Black sesame seeds are rich in calcium, iron, magnesium, proteins and fatty acids. The acetic acid in black vinegar reduces hypertension, LDL cholesterol, and improves blood circulation; black soy is rich in proteins, fiber, and anthocyanins. And Vitamin B, Niacin, Vitamin E, Calcium, Magnesium, Iron and Zinc are found in much higher levels in black rice compared with white rice.

Eating is a multi-sensory experience, and what you see in front of you prepares you for what you are about to smell and taste! So, do yourself a favor and add some color to your plate. Doing so will add more years to your life!

For more info, check out www.eatright.org/nnm

Image credit: rentalprojectors.com

Getting your kids to eat well is a full-time effort, but healthy food is only part of the equation. In our super-sedentary culture, it takes more than just a one hour dance class or weekly soccer game to keep kids in shape.

Organized sports and active classes are great, but sometimes it’s fun to actually be active WITH your kids! Here are some important steps you can take now to get your family moving…

If  you want an active child, you need to be active yourself.
You can’t just talk about exercise — you need to make it a priority for yourself as well! And you can start at home by limiting TV and computer time. The University of Washington Center for Public Health Nutrition reports that the average U.S. child spends more time in front of a screen than he does in any other activity besides sleeping.

Encourage active play
Make available jump ropes, Hula-Hoops, balls, scooters and tricycles or bicycles when the weather is nice and play outside with your kids.

Plan active play inside
Livestrong.com suggests a mini-trampoline or indoor hopscotch rug. Kicking a soft, sponge-type ball back and forth down a hallway or even a soft standing punch bag can work up a heart rate, or set up an indoor-friendly obstacle course (And there’s the always favorite, chasing each other around the dining room table). You could also turn on some music and have a dance party, All you need are some great songs and you can have fun dancing anywhere and burn calories at the same time, If you have a Wii, Kinect or other active video game, try a game like KidsBop Dance, Just Dance, Dance Central, or Zumba Fitness.

Institute simple exercise activities with your family.
Plan a walk after dinner, start taking the dog for a longer walk together, or a simply schedule a weekly Saturday morning family walk. Even a quick shopping trip to the mall or grocery can be active if you park farther away and walk the perimeter of the mall or store. Or you can try one of these great, active indoor activities

• Year-round indoor rinks and cold-weather outdoor rinks are open all around St. Louis. For indoor skating, try IceZone at St. Louis Mills or Hardees’s Iceplex in Chesterfield. Some St Louis outdoor rinks you can hit up are Steinberg Skating Rink in Forest Park and Shaw Park Ice Rink in Clayton.
• If the cold bothers you, you can also try rollerblading with your kids. If you live in a low traffic neighborhood or near a park, nice weather makes it easier. And you can find skates or rollerblades at a sporting goods or toy store, and even gently used ones at places like “Play It Again Sports”. If you go to a park, make sure they do allow rollerblading by checking online for rollerblading locations, though. I once took my kids rollerblading at the zoo, and we were escorted out by zoo security!
• If you are feeling particularly adventurous, and your kids are old enough, you might even want to try indoor rock climbing. Indoor rock climbing is growing in popularity and there are new walls popping up all over St. Louis. Some of the better know rock climbing walls can be found at St. Louis’s REI Store, The Center of Clayton, Upper Limits, or Lifetime Fitness.
• And, one of the easiest activities to share with your kids is bowling at a neighborhood bowling alley.

When my kids were younger, I would take them to a local indoor skating rink a few times a week; not for lessons or hockey but just to skate. At first I kind of just grazed the wall slowly with them, but became much bolder as time went by. They loved going around and around the rink. No pressure to be perfect-just active family fun. It was a great way to work off steam after school and have fun at the same time.  Years later, that fun stayed with them, too! We even hit the ice rink  (although it was a “composite” ice) on a recent family trip!

Once you’ve made suggestion and/or tried places, put your child in charge.
Let your children choose an activity of the day or week. Batting cages, bowling and neighborhood play areas all count. What matters is that you’re doing something active. And continue being active with your kids at home. Have them help yard work, like raking, weeding, or planting flowers; shoveling snow, or washing the car.

Make physical activity a normal part of your kids’ daily life, not just an add-on!

Image credit: tweenparenting.about.com

Many of us with pre-teen daughters are constantly surprised by how volatile each and every day can be. One minute they want to snuggle up and hug you, the next they are angry and slamming their doors.

The pre-teen years can best be described as the pre-teen push-pull. “Developmentally they are operating on a pleasure principal and the need for immediate gratification,” says Susan Gartenberg, mother of four daughters and a school counselor in the Ladue School District.

It is the best of times and the worst of times. Look at it as one more developmental stage: this behavior is necessary to being teenagers. Teens need to learn to be independent within the safety net of their parents. Raising our kids to be independent while teaching them that it’s okay to make mistakes can be a tall order.

Recently Jessie, my 12 year old daughter and I were visiting with my uncle and his friends. Having kids in their 20’s, Jessie was proving to be their “youth expert” as they asked her questions about e-mail, texting and friends. I was somewhat surprised to hear her responses. She was engaged in the conversation, being as truthful as she could-even discusings middle school politics and popularity. She didn’t seem bother by much of it; she handled herself with a grace and poise I am often not privileged to see.

On the way home, we were having a conversation about homework or some silly thing and she became a different child. She was angry with me for asking, even angrier at my wanting to talk about it. The sweet, easy-going girl for five minutes ago? Replaced with a raging, upset pre-teen snapping at me. I think of having a pre-teen daughter as the best of times and the worst of times. Because it can be!

Mindy Grossman a counselor in Parkway explained, “Although pre-teens don’t think they want limits set for themselves, they really do. They crave independence but they are also scared to be independent so they need parents to guide them. They like having parents set limits so that they don’t have to make the hard choices. We need to explain our concerns and our non-negotiable items. For you, safety and being well supervised is a non-negotiable. Don’t feel like you have to explain your choices to anyone else, either.”

Here Susan shared her suggestions for dealing with pre-teens:

• Don’t minimize their perception of what is “life or death”. They will tune us out immediately.
• Try not to take so much personally; understand that many of the behaviors teens exhibit are important developmental steps to becoming independent. Remain confident in yourself and your parenting skills.
• Give pre-teens the opportunity to negotiate small steps before taking the big ones. We do this by not over-reacting, but by modeling informed decision making. The clearer the limits, the more freedom kids have.”
• Slow down. The “wait and see” is great. Sometimes the plans they have are so crazy it makes your head spin. Put off your answer. Stall. Often the plans dissipate and you don’t have to be the heavy. (Save it for when you really do need to be the heavy.) My own favorite response, “Honey, you sound so excited about this. Unfortunately I can’t think the details through all the way right now. Let’s talk in a few minutes when I can really listen.” (Really listen is code for: take a deep breath and say a prayer)
• Use empathy, reading, listening, talking to other parents and using them as resources.
• Be clear and concise: less is more. They will hear what they want. Use statements like, “Let me give that some thought,” And “I need more information.”
• Take yourself out of the equation. This is their journey.

Through it all I see glimpses of the young woman who is emerging. My daughter has always been high spirited and so this is part is my journey…figuring out how to best help her achieve her developmental milestones and become the person she is meant to be.

As Mindy Grossman said, “We are all doing the best we can every day.”

When asked if I wanted to do a review on a “Make Your Own Candy” kit, my kids, ages 7 and 11, were excited to choose from making their own chewing gum, gummies or chocolate. It was a no-brainer for this chocolate loving family. “Make Your Own Chocolate” was the overwhelming favorite. And after all is said and done, I think we made a very good choice.

The makers of Glee Gum have created these family friendly activity kits, which are all-natural, educational, and eco-friendly. With pre-packaged ingredients and easy-to-follow instructions, everyone aged eight and up can get a real kick out of making candy from scratch. Each kit is designed to captivate your interest, connect you to the global community, and create something yummy to eat in the process!

Each kit comes with it’s own story, and since we chose chocolate we talked about the history of the cacao beans. The kit included two cacao beans, which were intended for the kids to peel, feel the texture, smell and taste. The kids learned in a hands-on way that chocolate is made from beans, and they thought that was pretty cool. Plus, the beans helped minimize the impatience while we waited for the chocolate to cool, using a very effective temperature indicator.  I thought that was an ingenious way for the company to encourage families to truly learn about the products they were making together.

The kits have simple step-by-step instructions, and I was able to assign the kids the pouring and stirring steps while I was in control of the heating element. We had the option of adding nuts, dried fruit or peanut butter, but to get an authentic taste of the the chocolate, we decided to keep it in its purest form.

One thing that I appreciated about this product is that it can be done stove top or in the microwave. The only issue that would make me question ‘ages 8 and up’ is in the final step when we needed to transfer the chocolate to the small paper liners. There was no mess-free way to accomplish this task. I finally resorted to using a small melon baller, which helped in its efficiency, although the kids could not really help in this final step. We used 15 of the 24 paper liners, which I thought was great so that if you do add ingredients, you have ample liners.

After being refrigerated for 15 minutes it was ready to eat. Since all of us enjoy dark chocolate (particularly my 7 year old), it truly was a big hit. In bite sized pieces, the 8 ounces from the kit goes far.

To order your own candy making kits, you can find a store locator by clicking here. You can also register for their newsletter.  To win a FREE kit of your choice, leave a comment below and we will randomly select our winner.

If you are looking for a unique gift this holiday season (or even thinking ahead to Easter baskets), this is certainly a product you should consider. For the month of December they are running a special on their signature gum, as well. Eight packs (one of each flavor variety) for $8.  A great stocking stuffer idea at a low cost.

Disclaimer: Bonnie received the Make Your Own Chocolate Kit free of charge. No other compensation was offered and it did not sway the integrity of this review.

Bonnie Krueger lives with her family in West County. She blogs random musings at Inside My Head . She began a second blog devoted solely to the memory and unique story of her mom’s childhood and internment in a concentration camp after WWII called Heart Speaks. She can also be found as a “Local Voices” blogger at http://townandcountry-manchester.patch.com/ or you can follow her on Twitter @BonnieLOK.

In January the US Department of Agriculture published a proposed rule to update nutrition standards for meals in the nation’s school lunch and breakfast programs. The proposed changes aimed to improve standards for the first time in fifteen years. And as Agriculture secretary Tom Vilsack has been quoted saying, “The United States is facing an obesity epidemic and crisis of poor diets threaten the future of our children-and our nation.”

The original proposal was to add more fruits and vegetables as well as limited starches, saturated fats, sodium and trans fats. As a parent it is really hard to believe that nutrition standards have not been updated in fifteen years. How have we not demanded more for our kids? Many schools have made steps in the right direction without the government guidelines. Kuddos to them!

The school where my children attend already have a rule in place that all snacks brought in must be healthy. I have to admit I am guilty of fudging the healthy snack rule myself from time to time. My daughter once said “Mom, we can only bring baked Cheez Its, these aren’t baked.” Of course I held up the clear plastic bag and said, “They look baked to me, go put them in your back pack.”

I recently has a chance to talk with Connie Diekman, Director of Nutrition for Washington University, about the proposed changes and children’s health. According to Connie, changes to school lunch menus will evolve over the next year with mandatory implementation required for the 2012-2013 school year.

But there has been much controversy since the new proposal was introduced, and even more when Congress rejected many of the Department Of Agriculture’s recommended cuts. One of the sources of controversy was the proposed cut of starchy vegetables like potatoes, corn and peas. The cuts were mainly to encourage a wider variety of vegetables. And school districts have also reported that some of the USDA proposals go too far, and cost too much when budgets are extremely tight.

Sadly many children don’t have parents that encourage good choices when it comes to eating. For example a mom who encourages her child to pass off regular Cheez Its as baked… The meals consumed at school mav very well be some kids only source of good nutrition.

The final version of the bill was released in mid November and many Americans were outraged. Congress declared pizza a vegetable. What? Apparently two tablespoons of tomato paste can qualify as a vegetable. If you think that is crazy, they also consider cupcakes a vegetable as long as there is a small sprinkling of dried greens on top of the frosting. Now that is my kind of vegetable!

All kidding aside, the Agriculture Appropriations Bill was signed by the president is now a law. That means that pizza and cupcakes are vegetables for at least another year.

Just because Congress has failed at making stricter guidelines for the school lunch programs doesn’t mean as parents we are not well within our right to demand change within our own school districts. It is ultimately our responsibility as parents to help teach our kids to make healthier choices.

This controversy, like all controversies, has sparked many interesting debates on the issue of nutrition at school. The childhood obesity problem is an epidemic in this country that will not be fixed overnight, or with this legislation. We will continue the fight for the absolute best when it comes to our children and that includes the lunch line.

As for me personally, next time I eat a slice of pizza with a side of cupcake. I guess I can just think to myself, “I’m really just having a salad.”

Works for me!!

Colleen Murphy is a working mother of 7, six girls and one very spoiled boy. She tries to find the funny side of life in every situation. Her glass is always half full and sometimes a little toxic. She prides herself in her big family and always says, “If I wasn’t laughing I’d be crying.” She adores her husband but often refers to him as the “Vilage Idiot.” You can find her online at as the Crazy Soccer Mom.

Image credit: http://www.gourmet.com

We all know that the best way to make sure your kids are eating well is to cook the food yourself. Busy lifestyles, however, don’t always make that easy. Unfortunately, we often fall victim to the easy out of fast food when we’re in a hurry, and that can undo all of our efforts to keep our kids eating well.

Luckily, there are many types restaurant options out there so taking kids out to eat can actually be a great way to teach them about healthy eating. In fact, the more they go out to good restaurants, the more comfortable they will be eating out, and the quicker they will learn what is expected, how to behave, and what choices are good for them.

Start by choosing a nice, locally-owned restaurant, and one that is more interesting than a typical generic chain restaurant. If you appreciate good food you can teach your children to do the same. Instead of taking them to places with loud music, video games and meal prizes, teach your child to love and revel in the pleasure of real food and good dining. Even children can learn to appreciate the good food at a nice restaurant, and by making it a special experience they’ll be more open to trying new foods.

Forget the kid’s menu. Most places only offer reworked versions of fast food favorites filled with fat and carbohydrates, but void of nutrition. When your child is very young with a small appetite, simply ask for a separate plate and serve a little bit of your meal to them. Offer him a bite of your steak, a spoonful of your soup. How will he know what he likes and what he doesn’t if he’s not given the opportunity to try it?

As your children, and their appetites, grow, explain the menu to them and suggest items from the starter or soup menu. You can order your child several appetizers, increasing the chances of hitting upon something he likes and opening his eyes to new flavors and combinations. The meal will be more satisfying and, potentially, less pricey. Consider the privilege of eating out an opportunity to exercise your son or daughter’s taste buds. Encouraging kids to sample foods from the starter menu can help them develop a love of foods you wouldn’t even imagine they’d like.

Let your kids ask questions about the menu. Your server knows the menu better than anyone else. Ask away to find out what she recommends. Try specific questions, “I like noodles and spicy dishes, but not something with a lot of meat, what do you suggest?” “He eats hamburgers and corn at home; what items might be close to those flavors?” If your child wants to talk about the food with the waiter or bartender, or ask the restaurant owner a question, let him. The more involved he is in the ordering process the more likely he will be to take ownership of a new taste.

Have your kid’s food come out when your food does; NOT before. If they eat before you, they’ll either be done or bored by the time your food arrives. Share your soup. Share your salad. When the main course arrives your child will still be hungry, but not overtly so, and will be able to enjoy their food.

While you’re waiting for your food, keep him involved in the conversation. Give him a taste of your salad or soup and then ask him what flavors he tastes and how he thinks it was made. You might be surprised by your child’s observations. Describe how a dish is prepared, or where a certain vegetable on the plate grows and in what season it thrives. By engaging your child in conversation, you can make the food and the experience of dining out that much more interesting. (And teach them to dine, not just shove food in their mouth).

In the meantime, also be aware of ways to limit extra fat and calories in your meals:

Ask about portion sizes and preparation. ALWAYS order salad dressings and sauces ON THE SIDE. They usually contain more calories than the food they are flavoring.

Go with what you know. Choose grilled, steamed, poached, or broiled, and make sure the chef doesn’t brush the food with butter as it comes off of the grill.

Make substitutions. Choose steamed vegetables over tempura vegetables (save 190 calories, 14g of fat and 10 g carbs), chicken teriyaki for chicken fingers (which can almost double the calories and fat), peel and eat shrimp for popcorn shrimp (save 150 calories), or salsa instead of guacamole. Order a side of pasta and use marinara sauce instead of cream sauce. Choose whole grains such as brown rice or whole-grain bread over refined white bread and rice. Pass up the French fries and the cheese-stuffed potatoes and order vegetables, steamed, or a side salad.

Think of what you like in a restaurant and help your kids enjoy that same experience with you. You might just be raising the next generation of foodies!

Harriette Kraus is an AFAA (Aerobics and Fitness Association of America) certified personal trainer.  Beginning her career as an English teacher and fitness writer, she turned her love for exercise into a new career. She writes about all things fitness, nutrition and health related, and has seen personally how being healthy as a family brings the generations together! You can read more about health and nutrition on her blog, www.fitnessbarista.blogspot.com.

With all the craziness that is called the Holiday Season, there is one aspect of it that I enjoy the most. Sending and receiving Christmas cards, particularly the picture post cards that Melody spoke of in an earlier post.

Personally, I also enjoy the letters that accompany some of the cards, telling me what trips my friends and family took that year, what direction their employment went, and the updates on their ever-growing-and-changing-kids.  I enjoy celebrating their successes and grieve in their losses, as well. Some people may find them garish or self-indulgent, but I find them sweet and entertaining.

We are usually faithful in sending out picture post cards, which have included all four of our kids when they were younger. But in the last few years, they have only included our youngest two. The 19 and 23 year old have lives of their own and, let’s face it, coordinating their schedule with ours to take a family photo in time to send out… Well, it can be a nightmare. And in case you are wondering, this year no letter or newsletter will be sent with it either.

As we decided to write “Have a Blessed 2012″ as part of the card, my husband wanted to add, “because 2011 just plain sucked”.  OK, maybe not all of it, but the latter half was nothing short of one crisis after another and nobody wants to hear a real-life soap opera. Just two cute kiddos ages 7 and 11, with a sweet 18 month old dog in the middle, works for us this year.

In spite of this favorite part of opening my mailbox, this year it is mixed with bittersweet, raw emotion.

In late 1979, I began corresponding with Bil Keane, creator of the Family Circus cartoon, who died November 8 at the age of 89. His wife Thel preceded him in death three years ago and they leave behind four sons and a daughter, who were the inspiration behind “Billy”, “Dolly”, “Jeffy” and “PJ”.

My first fan letter, sent out at the tender age of 12, sparked a life-long friendship with Mr. Keane. His daughter Gayle, who handled his fan mail and was involved with helping coordinate his public appearances and schedule, conspired with my mom to surprise me with my first trip to meet him and his wife in the spring of 1987, which was to celebrate an early 21st birthday (accompanied by my mom).  Years later, in 2001, my husband Tony, my son Adam, and I travelled back out to visit him again in his home in Paradise Valley. I wanted he and Thel to meet my own “Family Circus”.

While I could write a book about the memories I have of his generous heart and kind spirit during both visits, it was the regular contact throughout the year that, in retrospect, I realize was even more valuable. Each year in December, I eagerly waited for my legal size, white envelope to arrive with his Christmas card addressed to me. Instead of a card, he actually mailed out a full 12 month calendar, with a personalized inscription. As a young teenager, it was inscribed to my mom and I. As I grew into an adult, his Christmas calendars followed me to my apartment address, my condo address, and to the two homes that I have lived in as a married woman. For 30 years, I have been blessed to receive his personalized calendar, which has always been proudly displayed on the cork board in my kitchen. It is ‘for show’ only, but I glance at it numerous times a day and am reminded of a rare and precious friendship, which has spanned 32 years. Every few years he would even take the time to write a letter telling me about his year, and in the 1980s, we would have the occasional phone conversation.  Over the past decade a lot of the extra communication waned, but with the exception of him not sending out a calendar the year his wife died, he remained faithful in keeping me on the ‘to send’ list every year.

Today I flipped the calendar to December and I wonder if this is the end of an era. I know Mr. Keane’s health had been failing over the last few years, and his son Jeff had been working alongside his dad to keep this 51 year old cartoon up and running in the daily paper. It was inevitable that one day Bil would have to permanently pass this family legacy onto his son, who was as passionate about “The Family Circus” as Bil himself.  It had always been the plan for Jeff to succeed his dad and working together was probably the highlight of Bil’s career. For Jeff, it must a bittersweet transition, as he seeks to honor his dad’s dedication to the strip.

Today I am pondering out loud as to what will become of the calendar tradition. Surely this holiday season is unimaginably difficult for the Keane’s children: Jeff, Gayle, Neal, Christopher and Glen. They are dealing with a private death that is in the public eye. Record number of sympathy cards and tributes are surely being sent their way as they personally grapple with life after the death of both their mom and dad. And I am still grieving too. I wrote another tribute to Bil Keane as my friend, which I will enclose in my Christmas picture postcard that I will mail to both Jeff and Gayle, whom I feel I have a personal relationship with as well. Over the years, they have both been so kind as to take my calls and to support this relationship that I realize impacted me far more than I ever gave credit.  I want them to know how much I appreciate the love and friendship the Keane family has shown over the years.

Like it or not, on January 1 my 2011 calendar will come down, perhaps with nothing to replace it for 2012. Instead, I will search through my 30 years of calendars that I have tucked away and pull one out that emulates the same leap year ‘schedule’ as this coming year. And I will remember Bil Keane, the cartoonist, but more importantly, Bil Keane, my friend.

Bonnie Krueger and her family live in West County. She blogs random musings at Inside My Head . A  second blog is devoted solely to the memory and unique story of her mom’s childhood and internment in a concentration camp after WWII called Heart Speaks. She can also be found as a “Local Voices” blogger at http://townandcountry-manchester.patch.com/ or you can follow her on Twitter @BonnieLOK